It's Almost Go Time

It seems like forever but my first race of 2013 is just around the corner, The Carrabassett Backcountry Cycle Challenge (aka - the longest name in the world).  I had other, earlier, races slated but some I skipped because I just didn't have the speed or skills back yet and others like the Maine Mayhem! got cancelled because of torrential rain. Pushing my race start back probably wasn't a bad thing since it gave me more time to feel like an actual bike rider but having my first race after smashing my hip to bits be a 100k mtb affair might not be so wise. 

Fortunately for me (and you if you bother to check back in a couple of weeks to read the report) I am not always prudent and lets face it, a total meltdown during the race is much more interesting to read and write about than something that goes smoothly.

According to my Strava account, in the last few weeks I've gone from averaging 3-4 hours a week to almost 8 so things are shaping up but how much real endurance will be in my legs by next weekend is the real question.  I crumbled on a 3+ hour road ride over the weekend and my best case scenario at the CBCC is 5 hours.  Egad!
To help prepare for the post race keg, I've been training my liver and dancing legs. Proof.

Marcy and I renewing our vows at Pop the Cork:

sealing the deal

and then party all night

I don't know about you but I'll be ready.

Riding With the Crissman

It has been AGES since I last posted.  Why?  Well a number of reasons really.  I haven't raced yet so it didn't feel like there was much of interest to write about.  I've also been super busy on the work and home fronts so there has been no time to squander.  At least not on the semi-regular basis required to keep a blog going.

My "training" continues to improve and I feel I'm this close (if you could see me, you'd see me holding my fingers this close together. Damn-it!  you can't see that either...) to being in good shape again and my hip has been feeling really good.  Some days I have a bit of nagging achyness, usually after a long run, but otherwise it feels good so who's to complain?  Me, that's who because that's what I do. 

The video above?  That's a poorly edited (ie - not) video of Mr. Crissman and myself tearing up my home turf on Sunday.  Still not faster than him but he has Enve rims and luscious chest hair so I don't expect to be. 

Words cannot express just how awesome this v-day card from my daughter is.  It makes me smile every time I look at it.

Slowly but Shirley

(and don't call me shirley)

Hip progress continues to be made.  For a while there, I foolishly thought that after a couple of months of activity, I'd be back to close to normal but that definitely isn't the case (ah, duh!).  You'd think I would have known that it would take a long time to get back after several months of complete atrophy.  I'm sure that part of me knew but I was hoping that it would come back quicker.  Thankfully, though, there's still several months before the real season starts so plenty of time to get my sorry excuse for legs going again.

thule 917xtr t2 + fat bike = semi success

The road bike is out for two reasons right now.  1, I'm much too stretched out on it with my current hip impingement issues and 2, I can't risk going down on a gravely/icy/slick corner and re-injuring the hip.  Lucky for me though, it's winter and I've got a snow bike clad with studded tires (thanks to Marcy for both of those things) and a somewhat upright position so I'm still able to get some decent riding in.   Snowmobile trails are my playground and when the conditions are right (like they have been recently) singletrack can be had as well (once it's somewhat packed down). 

snowmobile trails in Damariscotta

Brynna Needs Friends

How do you know when a kid needs friends?  When she starts making her own.  In this case, she used a rolled up yoga mat and a foam roller.  At least these friends don't eat much and you don't have to worry about them coloring on the walls.

Not at all creepy.  I just hope I don't wake up one morning to these bastards sitting next to the bed.

Speaking of coloring, I just came across this book that B made me for christmas. 

Notice the "bike race" shirt I'm sporting.  not sure why I'm wearing a toupee...

and a surprisingly good drawing of our living room as I fly her like a plane. 

Laters.

DOG Is My Co-Pilot 

I rarely take Autumn riding with me these days.  Mostly because she has too much hound in her and I lack the training ability to keep her close without having my eye on her every second.  If I don't pay attention for 10 seconds and she gets on a scent, she'll be gone for 10-20 minutes.  When I take her running, I can keep a closer eye on her and call her back in a much more timely manner but that's hard to do on the bike.  But since I can't run right now I've been taking her out with some (minimal) success.  At least where we live, there is minimal chance of her getting into any trouble since we have hundreds of wooded acres behind the house and all of the neighbors are on the opposite side of the road.   She may not be the best trained dog around but at least she's not getting fat...

This weekend, I made it out on the Mukluk 3 days in a row.  Each time for less than 1.5 hours but damn it felt good.  I'm starting to feel some semblance of fitness coming back ever so slowly and my hip flexibility is steadily (and very slowly) improving as well. 

 Out With The Old

For how many years I can't remember, I've bee using a pair of trusty Gaerne winter riding shoes on both my mountain bikes and road bike to keep my toechies warm and snugly during winter riding.  They served me well but after what must be ten years of considerable use (if you are a reader of this blog, you know that my typical riding volume only slightly decreases over the winter) they have finally shit the bed.  First, the outers got cut which allowed snow and water to enter the inner sanctum so a pair of Pearl Izumi shoe covers were added.  As we all know, shoe covers for winter mountain bike riding are about as durable as Lindsay Lohan's nose in a coke house.  First, the toes ripped out from walking in the snow so much (as one is required to do a fair amount of in the winter) so duct tape was added, multiple times.  Then, the arches ripped out so yet more duct tape was added.  Then, the zippers shit the bed so velcro straps were put to work.  And, all this time, the shoes seemed to be losing their magical feet keeping warm ability as the inner liners disintegrated.

 when they were young'uns

oh, the memories

The Gaerne's were expensive but well worth it when you spread the cost out on a per ride basis.  I'm guessing that they might have run me 20c a ride.  Probably less actually.  A very worth investment for winter comfort, but, time marches on and given my current mobility issues (I have extreme difficulty reaching the right side of my right foot) making these shoes/covers hard to put on and the general shitty state of the shoes, I decided it was high time for something new.

Sooooo, in walk my new Lake MXZ303's.   These bad boys sport a rugged (and soft) Vibram sole so the winter trudges should be more enjoyable, a Boa lace system that is super easy for me to operate given my flexibility issue and a wealth of impressive sounding words about how they keep your feet warm.   

"water-repellent PITTARDS"? Is it getting hot in here?  "OUTLAST liner"  you know all the right things to say.  "water-repellent AIRPRENE shaft"  my shaft is getting more water-repellent by the second.  "toe box with THINSULATE insulation"  Holy Shit!  "THERMASOL insole interrupts the cold bridge between pedal/cleat" Ahh, that was nice.

Time will tell how these new togs treat me but their maiden voyage was sweet so I've got nothing but high hopes (and soiled underwear). 

 Operation: Pack 'Em!

If you follow me on Strava! you probably noticed that I've spent a bit of time out on the snowshoes packing down the loop at the house.  I had over a foot of powder to work with so it wasn't easy - powdery, mealy snow is tough to ride in.

Operation: Pack Em's! official mascot.

 obligatory self portrait

 a very tired (and cold) pooch afterwards.  

B is taking care of her...

The plan payed off though with a (mostly) successful, albeit slow, snow bike ride yesterday and then, when I went out again to pack this morning, things had firmed up nicely.  Rejoice!  At least until the next frickin snow hits us.

Happy Brew Year 

Ha! See what I did there? Super clever huh?  I slay me...

My brother and I have taken the plunge  and started down the popular road of brewing our own beer.  We brewed our first batch a couple of months ago.  Things went pretty smoothly except the brewing instructions blew (at least for actual noobs) and we ended up with a bit of a stuck fermentation.  After thinking we'd have to dump the batch, we salvaged it and had a successful bottling.

bottle, bottle, bottle

On Christmas day, we tried our first bottle.  Because of the stuck fermentation and a slightly low FG, we were afraid we'd be spitting the beer on the floor after the first sip but, thankfully, it wasn't horrid (no worse than Bud) but it wasn't exactly revolutionary.  

proper testing glasses

hmmm, it looks like good beer and smells like good beer 

but tastes like mediocre beer

Darren was happy enough.  The cat? 

Not so much.

Next step?  We've got a brew scheduled in a couple of weeks with a guy who actually knows what he's doing followed by an IPA brew of our own with astounding success (it pays to be upbeat).

 When Good Parties Go Bad

My company holds on to a good tradition; a Christmas party that is actually fun.  I've heard that back in the old days things could get pretty wild but things have changed a bit.  Everybody is a teensy-weensy bit more PC and we have clients at the party so you can't let it all hang out BUT good times can still be had.  For a few years fun was had by all because of the copious amounts of jello-shots available and everybody has fun when jello-shots are around.

Case in point.  The party from a few years ago ended up with me in my coworkers dress when we went to an after party down the street.  Dudes were buying me shots all night at the bar.  I should do it more often.

Do I look drunk?  Didn't think so.

 Anyway, jello-shots were outlawed a couple of years ago because the staff got tired of cleaning up the mess (party poopers) and the last two parties were lame so I took it upon myself to create a covert jello-shot station that provide good times to at least the inner circle of fun folks.

 my contribution.  a fifth of vodka is in those cups.  yikes

Beers were drunk, shots were had and dancing ensued...

ummm, yeah.

and pants were rolled.  (it's something I'm trying to get to catch on.  for some reason, it isn't working...)

Bit by Bit

(editor's note: as I completed today's entry I realized it is almost an exact rehash of last week's post with a few more nuggets thrown in, but it's written so here it is)

It's still slow going on the recovery but, every once in a while, I seem to make a big improvement.  Three or four weeks ago, I got the go-ahead to walk unassisted again and to do whatever I felt comfortable with.  At the time, I didn't think it would be all that much.  Fast forward a few weeks and I find myself able to trail run (close to three miles on Sunday) AND I did my first mountain bike ride since the injury.  A full 4 1/2 months later.  When I first hurt myself, I thought that I'd have to wait til mid February (if I was lucky) to get really active again so I'll definitely take it.  I still have to be REALLY careful since the hip isn't healed and a bad fall could mess my shit up but I'll take what I can get. 

I also think that there is a blessing in disguise in this whole situation.  I'm not the one trick pony that a lot of cyclists are since I do a lot of running, snowshoeing, lift some weights and do core work but I was still heavily weighted on the riding side and other parts of my body suffered as a result.  Since I am now forced off of the bike most of the time, I've had to come up with new ways to torture myself and relieve the copious amounts of stress in my life (I didn't realize just how much cycling did that for me until I couldn't do it anymore).  First it was swimming because it was all I could physically do (albeit really really poorly) with a bit of elliptical mixed in.  I quickly bored of the elliptical but was able to introduce spin class.  Spin class isn't bad and I'll do it as much as possible but it still wasn't quite doing it for me.  As a result, I've starting doing a High Interval Training (HIT) class; essentially a class that has you do multiple exercises in a very short period of time.  On paper the workouts look easy but actually completing them is complete torture made all the more painful since you're surrounded by women while the "real men" pump iron and have no clue that they're working a fraction as hard as us women folk.

It seems to me that come spring my riding legs might not quite be there but the rest of my body is going to be primed to explode.  At least I hope so because, as I sit here, I can barely lift my arms enough to work the keyboard.  I sure hope this is worth it!

So Nice of You To Care 

Three weeks ago, I got the OK from the doc to resume life again.  The hip isn't totally healed yet but the x-rays finally showed signs of healing AND I was able to walk without pain (but with a limp) so I was given the green light to do anything that I was comfortable with.  At first, I just started walking without my cane, doing the elliptical at the gym and upping my swimming but with everybody nagging me to get off my ass  

I had to do something so I've started spin classes, riding the trainer on occasion and doing some full body workout classes at the gym.  Those HIT (High Intensity Training) classes will be kicking my ass this winter.  As I type, my only fully functioning muscles are in my fingers while everything else refuses to move/threatens to cramp.  For somebody who revels in pushing himself to the pain threshold, this is a very good thing.  If you happen to be one of my VERY LUCKY Strava followers, you can see that the activity level has been turned all the way up to 11.

 

Hopefully, with all of this training (over two hours at the gym yesterday), I won't be a total waste when I finally get to hit some of this in my backyard. 

When will it be?  I'm not sure yet but I prepped all of the bikes this past weekend so that as soon as the tower gives the OK I can hit it (really slowly).

Cheers.

Controlled Drowning

No, I'm not dead.  The lack of posting is a direct result of being ballz deep in work.  10-12 hour days are not conducive to coherent babble.  Plus, on my list of priorities, I prefer to annoy my actual before my virtual (you hosebags) family first.  Sorry, sometimes finishing second is a good thing because it means there's no pressure to perform the next time.  Ummm, there's a sex joke there for sure but any sex joke that involves me finishing second is so far from reality that I fear the internet fact checking machine would be on me in no time.

I have yet to try riding the trainer again but all is not lost.  I have taken up competitive swimming (if the sport is being the worst/slowest swimmer in the pool) to help get back into shape as well as improve my hip's mobility without stressing it too much. Things started out very grim since I don't know how to swim with proper technique but after a few non-starters that had me stopping and spluttering for air half way down the pool (say ba-buy ego!) I've finally started to get the hang of it.  I still can't do more than one length at a time but at least I'm not gulping water every three strokes like my earlier attempts.

Speaking of the hip.  The x-rays are still not showing much improvement BUT I am feeling a shit ton better so the doc has allowed me to start doing some crutch free walking.  Joy!  I still use the crutch  out in public (so I don't have to explain the weird limp) and when I have to cover long distances but at the office and at hope I'm now crutch free.  It may sound weird but being able to carry things in both hands is quite, ahem, stimulating.  Get it?  Both hands?  Stimulating?  You guys are slow this morning...

Giant penis jokes aside, I'm feeling pretty good about my recovery.  I still don't know for certain if it's healing properly so a fake hip is still a possibility but I'm feeling better faster than I expected so I'll take that as good news.  In fact, the doc said that if all continues as it is, I could be riding (tentatively in another month!).  Time to get the fat bike put back together so when the day comes, I'll have a slow and steady steed ready to rock.   

Punkin Festival 

The Pumpkin Festival in Damariscotta, about the only place that you can see huge decorated pumpkins, hollowed out pumpkins used as boats for racing, pumpkin catapults and, AND watch a 1000lb pumpkin crush a car. Pretty boring stuff really...

600+ lb freaky bunny?  totally normal

 pumpkin made into a candy apple

Saw this beaut as well.  A bike with a two stroke engine.  Saw it in action later and laughed at the absurdity as he "drove" it sputtering and stinking DOWNHILL through town where a normal bike can easily keep up and pass cars anyway.  I'm sure there must be some place in the world for a bike like this but I'm not sure where it is.  Don't want to sweat too much on your way to work but don't mind smelling like a chain saw exploded in your lap?  This is the bike for you.

And finally, some transplanted New York carney action.  Enjoy.

Sometimes Art Makes You Sad 

 Art can elicit many emotions.  Sadness being one.  Observe:

  click on the image to get the full effect

Brynna's drawing makes me sad for a couple of reasons.  One, she can't spell worst for shit.  Two, she obviously realized that night that she did something very wrong (we don't often send her to her room) but had no control over her emotions and only came to terms with it when she was in her room by herself.

BUT, art can make you happy.  I, for one, am impressed with how well she represented herself going upstairs in a simple 2-d drawing.  Take a look at the photo below to help you understand.  Looking straight on, our stairs look almost exactly like what she drew.

Then, if you study the drawing more closely you can see that she was obviously wearing a stripped skirt and flowered skirt that night (not all that uncommon).  Of course, I'm going to have to ask her about the vampire fangs and creepy insect leg.  Just to be safe, I've got an exorcist on speed dial...

A Cripple's Musings

There are a couple of silver linings to my injury.  One, I've spent more time with the fam since I got hurt.  Much of that time was drug addled but, since getting off the hooch, things have been much better and I've enjoyed the added family time.

who wouldn't want more of this?

or this?

The other good news is that I have been absolutely buried under a metric shit ton of work for the last two months so, even if I were allowed to ride, very little would have happened anyway and not riding because of work on a regular basis pisses me off.  That's sort of a back assed silver lining but I'll take it.

On the rare moments when my mind gets to wander, I wonder when I'll be able to ride again (surprise!) and what the best form will be.  I'm hoping to be able to do some sort of riding this winter.  I'm certain I'll be spending a fair amount of time on the indoor trainer and probably in spin classes but riding indoors wears my patience down to a nub so I'm sure I'll be craving some outdoor action.  To that end, I expect to pick up a cheap ass set of xc skis at Plat It Again Sports to do some back country excursions around the ranch.  But xc skiing is a poor excuse for riding (I know, I know, it's totally awesome but it's not riding) so when I saw these, my heart got pounding:

studded snow bike tires

What could be more perfect than a studded snow bike tire in my condition?  Tons of cushion and grip for snowmobile trail riding with little chance of falling (and breaking a hip!) on unexpected ice, extra stability for occasional road jaunts and improved mental stability for me.  Lord knows I've been holding my shit together pretty well so far but at some point I'm going to become an unbearable ass (I'm generally a bearable ass). 

I May Have A Problem 

Ever since I was a kid, I was into competition. Didn't matter what it was, if it involved at least two people, I wanted (desperately needed) to win. Even if nobody else was racing. Sledding as a kid was downright dangerous.  Hiking?  I was the first to the top.  Riding our bmx's around the yard?  Fuck that, let's set up a race course.  Baseball, track, basketball (although I sucked at basketball), football, basically any sport I could get my hands on in school,  I wanted to rule whether I actually did or not. 

After college (where I competed in academics (I know, totally lame)), mountain bike racing filled that void.  MUST COMPETE!!!!!!  Now that I've been out of action for two months, I'm getting restless to compete in something.  Anything.  On Saturday, while watching B's soccer game, I decided that once I'm better I'll play soccer even though I was brought up to think of soccer as a sissy's sport (no worries, I have since repented even though I do still think it's stupid).  Then, on Sunday, the whole fam went swimming.  I suck at swimming but apparently it will be the only aerobic activity I'll be able to do for a while that doesn't hurt the hip.  I swam about a quarter of a mile.  Pathetically slow and trying to not make eye contact with the life guards for fear of having to drown myself out of shame and humiliation.  I was thoroughly humbled but felt good to have gotten an actual workout in.  As we left the community center I see this:

Hmmm, swim team.  Competition.  Juices flowing.  That is, until I saw the schedule.  Monday and Wednesday 3:15-4:15?  In the afternoon?

Do only retired folks and independently wealthy people swim?  Shit, time to take up competitive needlework.

Can't Get Much Lower 

The other day I made my first trip to the grocery store since hurting myself.  Pushing a cart around was out of the question so I very meekly grabbed one of the lil electric carts because nothing says man like cruising around the produce section at 1.3 mph.  I tried not to notice everybody looking at me out of the corner of their eyes as I dropped (and ran over) pears, romano cheese and tortellinis.  Eventually, I got the whole steering while shopping thing down and pulled my shit together.  That is until I entered the dairy section and on two occasions overshot my destination and had to awkwardly climb out of my cart (even I can't handle the humiliation of the back-up beeper on the cart) to fetch eggs and milk.  As I was grabbing the milk I heard mumbling from behind me (did I mention that I had gone swimming earlier in the afternoon and had water in the ear so I was essentially deaf as well???) and turned around to find a 80+ year old woman with an obvious limp offering to help me with my grocery shopping.  At the moment, I didn't think I could get much lower.  That is, until I got to the register where the M.R. (is that the PC way of saying it?) guy who has worked at the store forever took obvious pity on me and offered to take my cart out and load it into the car for me. 

Please hip.  Heal faster.

Bradbury 12 2012 

This weekend was the annual Bradbury 12, typically my last race of the season.  Of course, this year my season ended a bit early but that didn't stop me from showing up.  It was a totally different experience witnessing the race from the sidelines instead of atop a saddle sore infested ass.  In a way it was way more enjoyable.  Sitting around a campfire was fun.  Popping my first beer at 12:15 was fun.  Seeing other folks wanting to die (Hi Will!) was fun.  Did I want to throw a leg over a bike?  Sure but it was cool being back in the scene and seeing folks I haven't seen in a couple of months.  To be honest though, when the day was done I was hankering to do a solo single speed again next year.  It was just too painful seeing Will take all of the abuse by himself. 

Marcy's team, "Rick's Bionic Hipsters" represented well with no serious injuries despite the very slick conditions and the trick bridges (one that dropped as you rolled over it!).

Marcy rolling in after lap 1.

Marcy after her first lap.

Brian in his hipster costume.  In his words "argh, soooo muchhhhh cotton!"

my guess is that someone needed some fresh balls.

Hattie Freye (the much better half of the Freye family) in her aerobercize outfit

will showing us how sexy chest hair and irony is done.

he swore off plastic (ie carbon) bikes last season yet showed

up to bradbury with a set of crazy Enve carbon wheels.  

well played.

and finally, Marcy sporting her new Singletrack Sisters Jersey.  

She now has friends to play with!