Can't Get Much Lower 

The other day I made my first trip to the grocery store since hurting myself.  Pushing a cart around was out of the question so I very meekly grabbed one of the lil electric carts because nothing says man like cruising around the produce section at 1.3 mph.  I tried not to notice everybody looking at me out of the corner of their eyes as I dropped (and ran over) pears, romano cheese and tortellinis.  Eventually, I got the whole steering while shopping thing down and pulled my shit together.  That is until I entered the dairy section and on two occasions overshot my destination and had to awkwardly climb out of my cart (even I can't handle the humiliation of the back-up beeper on the cart) to fetch eggs and milk.  As I was grabbing the milk I heard mumbling from behind me (did I mention that I had gone swimming earlier in the afternoon and had water in the ear so I was essentially deaf as well???) and turned around to find a 80+ year old woman with an obvious limp offering to help me with my grocery shopping.  At the moment, I didn't think I could get much lower.  That is, until I got to the register where the M.R. (is that the PC way of saying it?) guy who has worked at the store forever took obvious pity on me and offered to take my cart out and load it into the car for me. 

Please hip.  Heal faster.