The Maine Mayhem!

Part 2

Ok, it's now obvious that a proper race report just isn't going to happen so it's abridged report time. When the bike portion of the race rolled around, I took an assessment of the folks at the line and decided that my teammate Anders, Steve and a couple of college age looking kids (see how old I am now? college KIDS???) were my most likely competition so the best strategy was to try to get out to an early lead and hold onto it. I THOUGHT I had only a 14 second deficit to Anders and roughly 2:00 to Steve so this shouldn't be too bad. Maybe, with luck on my side, I'll pull off the overall.

the annual berm shot

At the start I gunned it and took the holeshot going into the woods (usually very important here since the single track is so tight and it's hard to pass) and quickly took a 10-15 second lead. At that point I couldn't help but think that this was going to be easy. Those thoughts were erased when the lead feeling crept into my legs and Anders easily bridged up after passing one of the young-ins. Anders and I rode together for the first two laps and I got nervous because he didn't seem to be having any trouble staying on my wheel and his full suspension was definitely an advantage on the really rooty sections of the course.

my brother, out of retirement, on the berm

 my buddy Tim did his first ever race.  He won his age

 category but lost in the number attachment category.

Going into the third of four laps, I decided it was time to see if I could get away so as soon as we lapped through I drilled it for about 5 minutes and was awarded a 30-ish second lead over Anders. From there I just tried to keep the pace up and eventually finished around 1:30 up on Anders and 10 minutes on Steve (haven't seen the actual results posted yet) and thought I had the overall in the bag.

Unfortunately, as Anders and I were chatting we realized that we didn't know how they were tabulating the overall. I thought it was based on overall time, he thought it was based on finishing positions but, in reality, it was based on your run time + your average lap time from teh bike race! Some quick math in the head lead us to believe that the overall would be very close between the three of us. In the (anticlimactic here but very exciting there) I nabbed the overall by 1.5 seconds and scored myself all sorts of bragging rights and a sweet Columbia waterproof jacket valued (so the tag says) at $350. Not bad for a $16 entry fee!

Steve waiting for the final results.  

I offered to settle it with an arm wrestling competition.  

(glad he didn't take me up on it)

Anders being all stoic.  He'd look even

more stoic in a nice new jacket...

Maine Mayhem! 

Part 1

The Maine Sport Maine Mayhem! was my first race of 2012. Usually, at this point, I've got at least a couple of races under my belt but that just wasn't in the cards this year.  Thankfully though, the Mayhem! is a perfect first race since it's a low key event that is close to home. This year, I decided to give the trail run/mountain bike race a try.  Last year a pair of running shoes was up for grabs for whoever had the fasted combined time of the two races.  I've been running a bit more this year so I figured I might as well give it a shot and because stupidity runs deep in my family, I was able to convince my brother to come up from Boston to take part as well. 

As soon as the 3-ish mile run started I knew I was going to be in for a hard race.  Initially, I was able to come close to the leaders pace but it was a pace I knew was unsustainable.  It was easily 1.5x my normal running pace and I didn't have the excuse of waiting for the dog to pee to explain stopping for a breather so I sucked it up as much as possible knowing that the race would likely be over in 20 minutes.  By about a mile in, most of the sorting had taken place with my brother and 6 others ahead of me on the trail.  This was also the point that I grabbed my GoPro camera from my mother and video'd the remainder of the race.  My vanity wouldn't allow me to wear the camera on the start line so, sadly, I missed most of the action at the beginning of the race but still captured most of the EXCITEMENT! of a trail running race.  Don't believe me?  See for yourself in Monday's post.

Rus coming in for second.

me trudging in for the finish with GoPro

dork band on my head.

By the halfway point of the race, it was way more than clear that I wasn't touching the front of the race.  My brother and Steve Wagner (the leader) were now out of site but I did have a couple of carrots in front of me; one of them being Ander Larson a bikeman teammate.  Try as I might, I just couldn't close the gap.  After one surge (which had me hitting a long time high of 181 bpm) I was able to close to within a couple of seconds of Anders but I just didn't have the legs for that final 10 feet.  I definitely need to work on my speed work with running because top end speed was nowhere in sight but at least I could maintain a pretty solid pace.

Finally, mercifully, I came into the final stretch and tried to give it a finishing kick and maybe finally close the gap to Anders but I had drained my ridiculously small storage of speed long before and ended up simply trudging across the line in 7th place instead just over 2 minutes down on Steve Wagner.  Steve is a strong rider but as I found out before the mountain bike race, he'd only been on his bike a few times this year so I figured that gap should be pretty easy to erase in the mountain bike race.

Joke's On You 

I know I promised a race report today but I decided to go on a 28 mile road ride this morning instead. Suck it!

Hopefully I'll get the report done tonight but I'm mountain biking tonight (hopefully) as well so that isn't likely either.  I'm just going to go ahead and tell you not to hold your breath.  It'll come soon and it'll be worth the wait.  Promise!

Maine Mayhem!

Yesterday was the annual Maine Mayhem! xc trail race.  Starting last year, they added a trail running race prior to the mountain bike race.  If one is so inclined, he/she could do one race or both.  Last year I chickened out on the running race since I was afraid it would completely blow my legs for the mtb.  This year I decided to throw caution to the wind and pull the double.  Partly because of the extra challenge (it's a small race with few expert/elite competitors in the mtb) and partly because there is extra schwag for the fastest run/mtb time.

I've run out of time for a full write-up today so I'll just drop a slightly edited video of the running portion of the race.  I didn't want to be the douche wearing a camera at the start so I grabbed it from my mom part way into the lap.

Full write-up tomorrow.

Almost Race Time 

The first race in my MTB calendar is quickly approaching so I've been busy making final preps.  This race is generally super fun with tight, fast trails, lots of little technical sections, berms etc etc but if it's wet, all bets are off.  It's still fun but it is a total gear destroyer.  A few years back lots of folks found that out.  As a result, I've now prepped my single speed to be ready to race.  I haven't ridden this bike as a single (or any SS really) in well over a year so I'm taking a bit of a chance racing it on Sunday but I'd rather chance a lackluster race than chance doing hundreds of dollars of damage to my new bike.  That said, we've got three sunny and warm days before the race so things should be stellar but I know if I don't get the bike ready, I'll wish I had.

Step one: find box of ss shit and find enough spacers and gears to fill up the free hub.

 

I can't for the life of me remember what gearing I used to use so I threw

three cogs on so I can test them out tomorrow on my pre-ride.

 

Step two: I've grown very used to the W-I-D-E bars on the Kona so the skinnier

bars on the Salsa had to go.  In order to do that, I had to steal the bars from the Mukluk.

Sorry girl.

Skinnies be gone!

Poor, sad, decapitated Mukluk.

Don't worry, you'll ride again.

Tah dah!  Large and in charge. 

Now I just have to bring a hand saw with me for the pre-ride 

so I can chop down the one choker on course that these will

be too wide for.

Finished.  Now it's time to clean the basement from the looks of it.

Tool and shit EVERYWHERE!

This Ride Is For The Birds 

Saturday was beautiful and sunny. No, that doesn't express it well enough. Saturday was BEAUTIFUL AND SUNNY!!!!! What was even better was that I was given the green light for a nice road ride in the morning while Marcy and B heading to a fund raising yard sale at B's school.  Score!  That is, until I got on the road and realized I felt like a turn souffle that had been slightly overcooked (nobody likes an overcooked turn souffle).  I did a quick calculation and decided that trying to push through the ick would likely leave me in the hole while getting home early and getting shit on the Honey-Do list done would leave me sitty pretty with the spousal unit so I decided to bail on the ride and head home. 

but first, I snapped this lurvly picture (exactly 1 mile from my house...)

upon getting home, I was swarmed by my adoring fans

stupid chickens love to roost and shit on my bikes although,

to be honest, this bike deserves to be shat upon

This coming Sunday is my first race of the season, the Maine Sport Mayhem! It conflicts with Weeping Willow which is an awesome race, but I like to support the local events (and drive 4 less hours) so the Mayhem it is. 

The interesting thing about the Mayhem is that, in addition to the bike race, they also do a trail running race just prior to the XC with bragging rights and extra prizes (a pair or running shoes last year) to the person who has the fastest combined time.  I've decided to throw down this year.  The running race is only 5k so hopefully it won't tax me too much before the XC race but that's all part of the fun anyway.  There are at least 3 dudes who I expect to be there who can trounce me in a running race (I know, because they all did at the HVNC race last fall) but I SHOULD be able to nab them on the bike.  Question is, by how much and are there any ringers out there just waiting to make me miserable?  I guess we'll find out on Sunday.

What A Difference A Day Makes

Yesterday I did something I never do - talk about how much I've been riding.  Well, today I wake up and feel like a lazy turd because I didn't do a lick of exercise yesterday and I likely won't today given that it's a Friday and there is beer to be drunk and guacamole to be eaten tonight.  I'm not sure when Friday night rides became verboten but they have in my mind so I'll live it up (as much as any middle aged husband and father can do) tonight and hope for some good rides this weekend so I can keep my slowly increasing fitness and ever so slowly decreasing weight in line.

I have news that would make most middle aged husbands/fathers foaming at the mouth.  There are now six chicks living with us.  No, I haven't become a Mormon, we've added some new chickens to our flock (currently down to two after weasel, fox and hawk predation).

We decided to change things up a bit this time and get four egg layers and two meat birds.

I'm not sure how keen I am on killing and plucking a chicken but I know that if I tap out, Marcy should be able to finish the job since, in the past, she's taken a dead, rotten seal and boiled and skinned it for soup - er - research. 

T-I-R-E-D

You might want to sit down for a minute before I tell you what I'm about to tell you. 

Are you seated?  No?  Well, what are you waiting for?

All set?  OK.  Here comes the bombshell.  My legs are tired because I've actually been riding and running a lot (for me at least) for the last couple of weeks.  There are always curve balls thrown in the way on occasion but I think (I hope!) that I've finally found a way to make it work this summer.  Three days in a row of solid rides and runs have my legs more shot than they've been in a while.  Yay!  I'm still a bit concerned about my endurance but the speed is coming along nicely and I don't have any long races for a while anyway so color me happy.

On Tuesday night the legs were shot enough that I actually busted out the rollers to massage the muscles a bit so that I wouldn't be a lactic acid bloated turd on the Wednesday night Cyclemainia mountain bike ride.

To be even more readyer, I showed up to the ride location a half hour early to get a decent warm-up in before the suffering began.  Unfortunately, just as I was about to leave, instigator number one, Sebastian, showed up to warm up for his own ride.  As a result, my warm up ended up being a suffer up with me chasing him around but at least the legs were ready when the group showed up!

Thankfully, all of this worked (mostly) and I was almost able to hang with Sebastian on the hilly somewhat mud fest.  The dude used to race elite downhill and it shows.  The faster, nastier, more technical things get, the faster he gets.  I was downright scared TRYING to hold his wheel (which I never really did) on some of the downhills (and uphills and flataways for that matter).

Now I hurt and my bike is a wreck so it's time for a day or two off while I fix things up a bit and get ready for the stellar weekend ahead.

We Have a Weiner! 

Right before the end of yesterday's polling of "what's new on my bike", Tim snuck in the winning answer and is now the proud new owner of absolutely nothing but a little more self respect (which he can use lots of) and pride in a job well done. Tim correctly guessed that I had new rims on the bike. More specifically, I have a whole new wheelset on the bike. Some fancy, schmancy Carver carbon rims mated to DT 240s hubs. My heart is all a twitter.

For their maiden voyage (and probably the first race next weekend) I mounted them up with a set of new Panaracer Rampages I had hanging in the bike closet. The rampages + some stans juice + bontrager rim strips = instant tubeless success. The tires/rims immediately held air and required the least amount of shaking/spinning to finish the job of any tubeless setup I've ever done. Four days and three hours of riding later and they don't seem to have lost any psi's. Golden.

Before getting the rims, I was afraid that I'd have constant concern about dinging the rims but I'm happy to say that not once while I was blasting through rock gardens yesterday was I even the least bit concerned and their stiffness, tubelessness and slight weight reduction from my other wheelset were welcome. It's too early to give a real report just yet but, so far, I'm happy.

Take A Guess 

Props to the first person who guesses what is new on my bike (there are actually a couple of things but I'm looking for one specific answer) as it rests against the chicken coop and the hastily built chicken run that I conceived and built yesterday so that we can stop keeping the local fox family so healthy.

And, also for your viewing pleasure is a second installment of Brynna singing. This is a shorter clip but she makes up for it with an extreme close up.

I wish I had more to write aboot (that's for my canadian fans) but things just aint too exciting these days. The quality of my training rides seems to be improving of late but weather  keeps giving me the high hard one.  After such a beautiful early spring, I guess we had this coming.  take this week for example, I had a hard morning road ride and an afternoon mountain bike ride planned for tomorrow so, of course, we're going to have 30's and rain all day. Joy! And then on Wednesday I planned to have another go at the uber fast Cape E. mountain bike ride I wrote and video'd about last week but that's looking like rain as well. I can be a tough guy and ride in the rain but rain + cold temps = sheer misery. Maybe I'll toughen up enough to do one of the rides.  Maybe.

My Wife Is A Nag 

But, at least she isn't asking for a diamond necklace.  I also like that she clearly notes that it is for her so I don't accidentally think that I wrote it to myself.  Bottom bracket shopping I go!

The Talented Side 

As you know, when you have kids, certain traits are passed on from the parents. With Brynna, I passed on the creative stuff and the goofy (ie - annoying) behavior. Marcy passed on her anal retentiveness (do not move that scrap of paper! IT NEEDS TO BE THERE!), hopefully her brains and (again hopefully) her ability to think in a linear fashion instead of my ADD approach to daily life. In this video that B wrote, directed and filmed B shows all of the traits that I passed on. Especially when you consider that I can't sing on key either.

Riding With the Massa 

It's gotten pretty rare for Marcy and I to ride together. We both enjoy it but with a kid, full time jobs and what not, it's just difficult to pull it off. Thankfully, sometimes the stars align and we're given a window of opportunity. That happened last weekend when the father-in-law took the spud for not one but TWO nights. Rejoice! Marcy and I took full advantage to get our first Camden ride of the year in.

There is good news and bad news in Camden these days.  The town and the local land trust are working together to create new trails which is sweet.  The sad part is that they are also putting in some cross country ski trails right smack dab in the middle of Camden's finest singletrack.  Three or so miles of primo stuff built (actually built with bench cuts and everything) are gone forever.  The good news is that they are adding trails back rather quickly and the new stuff is fun as well.  Marcy and I did the new outer loop for lap one and it is sure to please.

Note, I didn't doctor this photo to get Marcy's skin to glow.  

That's just what us Mainers call "spring skin".

After our first loop, Marcy headed off to town to spend my prize gift certificate from last year's Runoff at Maine Sport Outfitters while I made a run to the top and tried to piece together some of the old decimated singletrack.  The ride to the top is still sweet but I almost cried when I saw what happened to the lower trails.

This photo has nothing to do with the weekend's ride but these were some tasty sweet potato tacos that Marcy made last night.  Yummers.

Oh, and do any of you ever wonder what your co-workers think of you?  Well, yesterday one of mine said he saw a video over the weekend that made him immediately think of me.  Everyone in the office watched it (including my boss) and agreed wholeheartedly.  I don't know if I should be proud or ashamed.  Check it.

Faster! Faster!

If there is one thing that I know at this point of the early spring season, it's that I need to get faster. Fast. I mentioned that I was going to the fastest road ride in the state a couple of weeks ago. What I failed to mention afterwards was just how horribly it went and how quickly I was dropped. No worries though because I'm a sucker for punishment and I'll be back as soon as my schedule allows (maybe next week) and at some point this summer I'll be able to hang. Hopefully. In the meantime, I'm trying to hang with the fastest mountain bike group ride in the state. I can ALMOST hang there since there is more than pure fitness required and I do, in fact, have a modest amount of technical skill but it's oh so hard watching Sebastian and Mr. Freye pull away from me after every regroup. Fast fuckers. 

Earth Day 

Earth Day was Sunday but it was supposed to be pissing rain all day so I decided to do my deed to the planet by doing trail work and instilling a love of being outside with my daughter and a couple of her friends on Saturday instead.  A quick trip to the Schmid Preserve for some trail work and a nice walk were in order.  Mission accomplished.

I figured that it being Earth Day and all, I'd show how I re-purposed my Kona King Kahuna bike box.  Kids love big cardboard boxes and I like doing shit with utility knives.  Match made in heaven (as long as the kid isn't already in the box...)

On the actual Earth Day, I did what any self respecting hack bike racer would do, I mounted up 3 tubeless wheels.  Two of the wheels are Marcy's new Hope P2/Stans Crest wheels that I just built up and one was an experiment with my Easton wheels.  They aren't technically tubeless compatible but I found that they aired up quite easily with a stans 26'er rim strip and just a bit of fiddling.  I initially tried some 29'er strips but they were far too loose.  I haven't ridden them yet but two days later they still have air.  I consider that a success.

Another Quickie

Only time for another quick video today.  This one is from the same ride as yesterday's short but in a techie downhill-ish section.  Boney fun.  Oh, and you get to see Kevin almost fall after hitting a 4" rock AFTER riding the tech downhill.  My friends make good blog fodder.

Yesterday, I did my first Cyclemainia Wednesday night mountain bike ride with Sparky and the gang on the Cape Elizabeth trails.  It's hard to describe the ride but let's just say it's sort of like getting gang raped by rocks, roots and skinsuit wearing buffoons.  Video to follow once I've had time to edit (ie: never).

Been Away 

 Hey all. Posting has been sparse as usual recently partially because I'm lazy and partially because we were away on a mini family vacation. My buddy and I did sneak a couple of rides in while away. Ringwood State Park in nothern Joisey (New Jersey for you unhip folks) is the shit. Bone rattling, bowel loosening, prostate hemorrhaging awesomeness. I have a bunch of video to go through including not one, not two, but three endo's by kevin (rare form indeed) but nary a moment to spare to do so right now so I'll drop this one on you for starters.  It gives you a sense of what the trails are like and, as a bonus, shows one of Kevin's endos right at the very end.  Enjoy.

Trail map.  We barely touched what it had to offer in 2 hours of riding.

More Than I Can Chew

It'll come as no big surprise to any of you but I feel like I'm behind the 8-ball this year.  To be honest, I (and probably most other working stiffs) do every year but this year I have semi-measureable proof.  The Paris Roubaix race usually marks my first serious group road ride.  One that I typically ride 30-ish miles to, do the 30 mile group ride and then slink home.  Years past I've felt comfortable doing some version of this ride.  This year the idea never even entered my mind.  Ruh, roh.

Well, its time to either shit or get off the pot.  If something doesn't happen soon, the early season will be lost so I've gone and done something stupid.  Stupid like planning to attend the state's fastest group road ride tonight.  Here's the description:

This is the fastest large group road ride in the state of Maine.  This is not a beginner event (there are no waits). All are welcome to attend. The ride is 48.5 miles and covers the bigger hill climbs in Southern Maine. The race pace* (23-27mph+) is close to a Cat III race. Neutral start until Libby’s Ice Cream shop.  Several sprints on this route include town line sprints, top of climb sprints and final Rt. 88 sprint. It is a very fun ride and great for training. The pack is usually 30-40 riders large. Starts the first Tuesday of April through the last Tuesday in August – every week leaving at 5:30 from Cyclemania. Expect a 3-hour ride. ALL TRAFFIC LAWS OBEYED.

Click HERE for the route map.

*Race Pace: This refers to hard efforts for the fittest riders with appropriate bike skills.  Riders are expected to be fully self-sufficient. If you flat, get dropped, or get lost then tough.  This is the level of effort to expect if you join the race team members on a team ride. (Expect no less than a Cat 3 ride level.)

Sounds like fun. Except for the fast pace, hills and three hour ride ride time.  All things that I haven't done yet this season.  Check in tomorrow to see if I survived...

Trail Destroyers 

We have these things called chickens.  Tick eating, egg supplying chickens.  At least that is what I expected.  What I hadn't counted on was their trail destruction capabilities.  They don't range too far from the house but the 300' radius around the house gets hit hahd.  Wicked hahd by their scratching and pecking.  In most locales, this wouldn't be that much of a problem but on my home trails, I have close to three miles of trail in 17 acres.  That requires trails in every nook and cranny of the property.  Some of it within the 300' circle of death.

 Take a trail like this:

Cleaned up at the end of the fall.  Stayed leaf and mostly litter free all winter.  Then these bandits go by and no more trail.  Notice any trail after B's ass?  Me neither.

Stupid, delicious chickens.

Suck-O 

Sorry to be out of touch for so long. The normal excuses apply but I have one more to add to the list, a "business" trip. There was some learning involved but there was also lots of getting down to business as well. A host with a healthy expense account will do that. I ran the first couple of days there but eventually the booze and lack of sleep got the better of me. I did ride one day but not in my normal sense.

That right there ladies and gentlemen was one of the best bull riding sessions of anyone there that night. Good enough to get my some high fives from the bull operator and some spectators. I was so good that I'm still sore from it 5 freaking days later. I used muscles that aren't intended to be used outside of the porn film industry and those muscles are still very, very angry that they were used on a bull. Lest you think it was easy, here are a couple of vids of my buds going as well.

Tim. Let's just face it, he's just not cut out for bull riding. Unless he's on bottom.

 Matt. Our gracious host fares slightly better but breaks his old man specs in the process.

 I sure do wish I had my go-pro with me.  the footage would have been thrilling.